Roar writer Abdus Shaik on the different kinds of physics students you will meet at King’s.
Physics… we all know that it is probably the worst subject you could ever study (if you actually think that, I hate you), but there is always that one person you know who studies it and they are quite… peculiar… and you probably know no one like them, unless you know two or more people who study it. But I think it is possible to classify them, so here are the kinds of Physics students you will find at King’s!
1. The show-off
We have all met this person, and if you haven’t, then you need to start socializing a lot more because these people are very popular. Meet the snobby Physicist! The “know it all”, the “I study Physics and that makes every point I make right and rational” person. They will put you down if you study any subject that isn’t Physics. They will feel disgusted when you talk to them about anything that doesn’t involve the motion of a particle or the propagation of waves. If you study Biology and you’re friends with this person, I feel very sorry for you… I’m here for you…
2. The one who doesn’t act like a Physicist
Now, this person is the complete opposite of the “show off” and they will be the most humble, down-to-earth person, who would act like they don’t even go to university, but deep down they feel Mathematics, and they know how to solve partial differential equations. But they would never, ever tell you until you ask them what they study. You would probably find them chilling at a pub with their friends while they enjoy life like they’re supposed to. But deep down, we all know it… they are smart.
3. The Theoretical Physicist
Theoretical Physicists are probably the strangest of them all. Why is that the case? Well, if you don’t know what I’m on about, you probably haven’t met one. They are all about perfection and art. For them, Physics is their life and they look at everything using the “lens of Physics” (yes, the actual lens). You’ll find them measuring the frequency of waves on the shore when they’re at the beach, or they might try to calculate the specific heat capacity of ice when they’re skiing on the alps. But they would never want to do an experiment, that might be the last thing you make them do.
4. The experimental Physicist
If you are studying at King’s, then these are some rare creatures. They are an infinitely small needle in an infinitely massive haystack! They will also avoid telling other Physics students that they enjoy lab work and would insult lab reports and feedback just because they want to “fit in”. You might find yourself inside a lab, under their experimentation, so they can dissect you for trying to make them solve a line integral.
5. The “I am right because I study Physics” Physicist
“Have I told you I am a Physics student?” Yes… yes, you have. A million times, when you dismissed our reasoning behind an argument just because it doesn’t “resonate” with you, and yes, we get it… because you study Physics!
6. The “black-hole” physicist
Oh, you show-off! Yes! We get it. You read too much and you are that “smartest” guy in a room full of “smart” people. This person will definitely ask the lecturer a question on black holes, even when the lecturer is talking about food. “What would happen to your burger if it went into a black hole? Would it sink in or float through?” This person is bound to ask questions beyond the scope of the course just because they want to seem smarter than everyone else. “Black-hole” physicists, I know who you are, and I am coming for your brains.
7. The one who loved to point out your mistakes
“Oh professor, you misspelled ‘absence’ in your notes on page 4, line 15. It’s spelled ‘absence’, not ‘absense’. We are all human and we all make mistakes… *evil grin*…” YES, WE GET IT! YOU CAN READ THE NOTES! While we choose not to… But please, give them a break?
8. The one who got an internship
This Physicist is very, very similar to the black-hole physicist. They will work day and night just to get that one internship at CERN or get onto that KURF program. But it doesn’t end there. They are obliged to rub their prosperous and fruitful success in our faces. We are happy for you, mate… but don’t make us regret being your friend.
9. The one who uses Latex
10.The one who would be annoyed if there wasn’t a number 10 on this list
From perfect font sizes to margins to captions on lab reports and citing references using citethisforme.comÂ (not a paid promotion), this person would go crazy and want me hanged for one crime: not including the 10th Physicist. So, I give you the honor of holding this position, my friend, but please, do not be upset because I have included 12 Physcisits.
11. The “popular” Physicist
Oh, the Physics group chat at 3 AM? Oh, you want to know who’s spamming? We know those spammers… we have our eyes on you and we are jealous of you. We want to be as carefree as you! We want to be able to proudly give up working on coursework so we can make sure people wake up to 99+ unread messages and realise it’s actually 1378 unread messages. We want to be as cool as you. Teach us, will you?
There are many other categories I could list down for you, but I won’t… because I’m the next and final category listed in this article.
12. The lazy Physicist
We are the most powerful creatures in the Physics department. When Einstein formulated E=mc^2 for particles with rest mass, he meant us. He formulated it using our marses (massesÂ +Â arses) that are always resting. You are welcome, Einstein!
Physicists come in all shapes and sizes (non-relativistic) and understanding their behaviour is crucial to understanding why Physics is the way it is. Its department and its students, in general, are very misunderstood at not only King’s but also at other universities. Perhaps articles like these would allow us to understand their nature and accept them as normal human beings in our society.