Welcome to Reggie Responds, Roar’s advice column! Our columnists are here to provide you helpful, or maybe not so helpful, advice. Tune in on Fridays to see what they have to say about your problems.
Q: I used to have a close friend of 4 years but last year, I found out that he did something to lose my trust. I confronted him about it but I wasn’t confident that he wouldn’t do it again because of the other people he’s friends with who influenced him to do the thing that he did. I’ve since blocked him on social media and cut all contact with him. However, despite my anger and the betrayal, I can’t find myself hating him and in fact, I miss him a lot. I really want to rebuild our friendship but I’m afraid of having the same thing happen again.
Matthew: This is a real difficult one. On the one hand you have to respect yourself enough to know to avoid any future betrayal. If this person has hurt you, and acted in an unforgivable way, then you shouldn’t allow yourself to go back into that dynamic. On the other hand, you shouldn’t blame yourself for not hating him. No matter what has occurred, ultimately this is a close friend of four years, you’re allowed to hold him, and the memories, in your heart, and retrospectively cherish their value. That doesn’t mean you’re being weak, or allowing him to win, it just means you are sensible and level-headed enough to see the bigger picture. In finding your own peace with the situation, you’re allowing yourself to progress in your own journey, and use history as a tool to advance and learn. Maybe you two will meet again, but for now, I think you know that’s not a good idea.
Q: Hello! King’s Admin has blocked all my access to King’s IT services – Keats, my email, Student Services, the whole deal. This is allegedly over a payment I made ages ago that King’s didn’t receive. I’ve done everything in my power to prove that I’ve made the payment; Credit Control still keeps asking for obscure documents. It’s been 2 weeks now and I’m freaking out about missing the start of term AND my deadlines. Please help!
Nikita: Hi there! I sincerely hope that in the time since we have received this submission, King’s admin has proven to be useful and helped sort out your access problems. In the off chance that you are still having login issues (despite it being the end of Week 2 of classes), try calling up King’s admin — although I’m sure you’ve done that already — again. It’s really strange that they wouldn’t be more helpful, especially since you have provided the relevant documents, but at this point, unfortunately enough, there’s really not much you can do except badger admin to locate your payment.
End of term deadlines and getting used to new classes is enough of a headache without having to go through this, so I am hoping your situation has been resolved by now. If not, I hope it is in time for you to make next week’s classes — as for missing any classes/ assignments, I’m sure your professors will be understanding given that you’re not at fault here!
For anyone else reading this who might find themselves in a similar situation, it’s always convenient to email a copy of the payment receipt, with the Transaction Reference, to yourself (bank statements are just as useful) — preferably to an email other than the KCL one. Then again, it’s all the more convenient if your payment doesn’t get misplaced in the first place.
If you want to submit a question, you can do so here.